832am
Just woke up and started the pc to write this.
I am wearing 4 pieces of upperwear, 2 of them made to wear only once, to keep warm. Like a double jacket. And because the bottom wear is 3 pieces, it feels cold. Though it is better than before, than all the days before this because the not-cold feeling since last 24 hours has been a blessing.
I wish I was a devout muslim. I wish I was never exposed to r/exmuslims. I wish I was ignorant enough to believe, or courageous enough to see and believe. I wish .. a lot. Maybe I need to stop wishing.
Today is going to be a bit busy because today is payroll day for our biggest client. Though now for the past two weeks, my activity in it has been limited to only monitoring and reviewing stuff. This is the one thing that actually gave me time to be more involved in HR and marketing ops, while sending out occasional 1/2 mails to the same client for research, understanding.
And here’s something that has been on my mind since the past few days Tess. I don’t think my sister would be able to become a doctor or even go to a University. Why? Because she wants to go outside Pakistan which we can’t afford. And dad wants to make her a doctor for which her numbers are not enough. Writing on the wall is this: we either let her do a private MBBS which is again, way out of our budget. Or we let her do a classic degree like I did, which I agree to, only because then she won’t be dependent on a man all her life to earn. I strongly believe every girl should educate herself and do a job, before marriage, because otherwise your food on the table is dependent on your man and … I don’t like men. I am one of them. There’s men on 9gag, on reddit, in my relatives, in the village. I have yet to meet a “perfect” man. Like they describe Muhammad to be. A word to the wise is sufficient.
I am even not a pro-marriage guy to be honest. I mean if you leave religion out of it, what is marriage? Two people live together, forever. How many forevers do you GENIUNELY personally know (have met) in your life that should have been actually forevers? How many should not have been? There’s your answer. And say what you want about me being a simp but a man is more powerful. Why? Society makes him so. Society exists outside of the house. How many families you know are comfortable enough with their females outside the house, daily? Leave the extremes out, some need to do it to eat, some need to do it to be eaten. Talk about the majority. The populace, the middle class, the working ants, the … us. I believe these things and yet, I am much much more experienced in matters of the world than my mom, who’s like double or more than my age, or my sisters. Why? Because I have stayed in boardings, I have had my share of bike accidents, I have lied and thieved and conned my way out of regulatory difficulties, all because I was “outside” the house. How many females can say this, versus how many do you know. Do a ratio analysis and you’ll know what I am talking about. I am not a feminist btw, more like a suffragist if you will, because money hijacked that movement and we see the result on every Women’s day in the second class citizens of this third world country. I should shut up. Mob justice is pretty cruel lol.
223pm
Welp! Got into a rabbit hole of the best productivity app again. Omnifocus, Skelpdo, Motion, Things3, Flowwsavvy, you name it.
Anyways, the day is going fine for now. I finally played a little in the morning today and then slept again lol. Woke up and did some work for like 2ish hours.
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