Today was sunday. It went away without me doing anything other than a party meeting. And let’s not … emotionalize it. Let’s take a step back.
I waste time. How can I convince my will to stop wasting time and work more. Work so that I can .. atleast secure a healthy, educated future for the kiddos, a dignified elder-care for mom and dad, and food and shelter for myself. Huh?
Work. Crypto. Fiverr and UpWork. Job. New Jobs. Build Bex. Start my own Notion competition. What? When the money is scarce, the thoughts are abundant. I don’t overthink. I underearn. And that’s because I don’t work enough. I work and then I play. Then I do party work which is voluntary, taking up time and money. And then I am too tired. Life is a cycle of Mondays and Saturdays and I feel like the dawn of a new Monday rn.
Maybe its just because tomorrow is Monday.
And I don’t understand why I hate Mondays? Really when its the PEAK of my work schedule, there’s like only 20/30% stuff which I don’t like that I have to do to earn. Otherwise I love everything I do as a Job. And that’s usually a 100% true, for atleast 50% of the days. I think those proportions make me very very lucky. But still here I am, a guy in his 20s whining and crying for more money, for more security, for more peace. Everything’s connected.
Here’s a secret I don’t tell anyone. I am secretly distrusting the process of planned political revolution as a means to bring change. A means to ensure government redistributes wealth from the likes of billionires to those that are havenots. But party is the only way I have of peaceful, organized, selfless catharsis.
bye.
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